when i get those mushy texts and shit my first reaction is "GAAYYYYYY!!!"
because im not used to it and it’s weird to me.
but damn… the one that i just got.. idk how to respond to it. my first reaction was to cry.. for multiple reasons.. one because that was probably one of the cutest things someone has ever said to me. two because you have no idea how there is someone else in the picture. three because lately ive been thinking how im supposed to tell you that i might want to stop talking to you for a few days.. and four because i have no fucken idea what to do with this whole situation..
i still havent decided which one to pick..
i have such huge feelings for Josh, because ive known him longer and we’ve been talking for awhile. but realistically, it probably wont work. we both just have soo much hope and want it to work. but communication is fucken key!! and he already went MIA for about a month once. AND! he just got kicked out of the house.. all things that a normal person would say fuck this and walk away.. but i just cant, i cant fucken do it.
then there’s the second guy, who i like but not as much. we talk all the time, has a place in sf, GOES TO SCHOOL! we listen to the same kind of music, have a lot in common, chill, actually has plans for his life. like he’s doing something with it!
but then it’s like i was supposed to go to modestep WITH josh, but then i met the new guy… fate?
if i DO pick josh, i already know what to say to the second guy. but if i pick him, i have no idea what to tell josh. i just cant do it.. who would the healthier relationship be with? definitely the second guy..
so it’s like what do i go with.. heart or head?
all of this is just stressing me out, and it’s all i can think about. because i have no fucken idea what to do..
What the fuck is this shit?!?
-Santa Cruz is too far to drive at night
-San Francisco is gonna be crazy, don’t wanna drive there and bart is gonna take days to get out there. But free rides after midnight haha
-don’t really wanna party with my coworkers..
Sooo therefore nothing to do -____- I really just wanna drink haha